But first about how to write.. someone I used to admire once told me a little something about my writing.. And I remember it still. She said “the best thing about your writing is how you go in detail to explain everything about it.” I remember that at this moment. Because the moment I think of love I find myself looking back at my very first experience in love. And I can recollect my past experiences like a movie and tell what is wrong and what is right. It’s as if love has been the same but the people have changed. It’s as if I have been in love all 31 years of my life. (Would be nice if that were true.) And yet I make the same mistakes.
I always thought of marriage as an instituition. Perhaps because of a quote I found in my house when I grew up. My parents had this quote on a piece of wood. It used to hang in the walls of my childhood home. The quote said “marriage is a fine institution, but not everyone likes to live in an institution” and I have always wondered..
I am now married and no I don’t think marriage is an institution anymore. If anything I find marriage liberating. But I understand that marriage is love. Everything I learnt about love as a teenager or an adolescent or even an adult I am experiencing again in my marriage. The fights, the romance, the seperation, the pain, the care, everything about my marriage tells me how alike love and marriage are. I even find myself wondering why I did not marry for so many years before I actually did.
But like any relationship, and most importantly than all, a marriage requires a lot of sacrifice. This is the closest i have ever felt to realizing a fairy tale. God knows exactly what we want and gives us exactly that. But one should know how to read the signs. If you find an opportunity see it as a sign and grab it with both hands. Life is to be lived, not watched.