Some moments in life are thick. Like waking up to an unknown chill or taking a walk by the stones on the seashore. And some moments are thin, like cleaning your room several thousand times and still finding that the dirt lurks around exactly where you always find it.
There is no attachment to neither of these worlds. Where is my morning sunshine when I wake up by 6 am? How long do I have to wait for it? I am absolutely mind blasted by having to wait for every little thing. Despite the fact that the entire universe functions at its pace, I want to be faster than it all.
I have waited long enough for most things and never received it. May be im angry and given up but that ridiculous hope inside my heart.. I don’t know if I should pity it or admire it. I am going to learn to make it my whole life.
How many times have I woken up this exact same time everyday, many many years ago. It was the most annoying thing I had to do when I had to wake up and go to school. I always looked forward for the future. Here I am, still looking forward for it. How silly of us to sometimes offer one of the most amazing parts of our life to some one or something so ridiculous.
This must be the first time I am openly regretting for all the years I spent being in love with people in the hope of forever. There is no “forever” in love. There is only work as hard as you can to keep yourself and everyone around you happy. Or give up and die.
Superwoman says there is a stage six in a break up. The stage of floating. The last and final stage where you swim back to the surface and float.. Apparently its a fun stage. I’d like to see that happen. Is that a good idea? Is it healthy? Only time will tell.
As of now, all that I can say is im catching up on my ritual of early awakening and it feels pretty damn good so far.
Cheers, Good morning,