I wont be bad to myself.

After all, i love myself. What is bad? What is good? What is pleasant and what is beautiful? These questions are in my mind right now because i need to know how to be happy.

I can be happy only when i know that i am beautiful and i cannot be beautiful without being good. I feel like some kind of a great ego is pulling me down and i am going to fight it. With my will and power.

I’ve been in relationships and i notice that its really difficult for me to love the person of my interest. I only want. I only care about what i want. I laughed when i noticed asking myself how can you be happy for someone you love. and i realize it means that i know that i don’t love the people i want. If i really loved that person, then i would really care and if i really cared about them, their happiness would be important to me.

Where does life draw a line between what is yours and what is not. I think my mind draws that line at friendship. I really care for my friends but the moment my friend becomes someone more close, i lose the care. I wonder why.

i stop caring because i have already gotten what i want. Its mine. I guess i need to understand that people cannot be owned. Men are not to be owned. You dont have to do anything with them. If they like you they would do what they want.

You cannot want anything in this world as nothing really belongs to you. I am a mind sitting behind my eye and watching the pleasantries of this fascinating world. I cannot possibly own anything, i can only experience everything i want.

So when you care for other people’s feelings, you can forgive, forget and start to understand people again. Shed a tear. Anger runs away shamefully. Love is not to be possessed, it is to be practised.


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